


The Light in Our Hearts

by DarthSuki



Series: To Love a Titan [6]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: All NSFW content is marked, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, Reader-Insert, Redemption, Shameless Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-24
Packaged: 2021-03-12 01:13:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,875
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29127024
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarthSuki/pseuds/DarthSuki
Summary: This is set within a canon-divergent AU series where the reader is the child of a noble family within the walls as well as a holder of a very unique and powerful ability. Reiner and Bertolt were originally sent to kidnap them and take them back to Marley due to said ability, but something entirely unsuspected happened that they weren't prepared to deal with: they fell in love with you.Now, the three of you live in isolation within the land of Wall Maria, trying to make a life out of what you can.Each chapter stands on its own about the adventures, trials and challenges for this trio, and do not inherently need to be read in a particular order.
Relationships: Bertolt Hoover/Reader, Reiner Braun/Bertolt Hoover, Reiner Braun/Bertolt Hoover/Reader, Reiner Braun/Reader
Series: To Love a Titan [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2123775
Comments: 6
Kudos: 116





	1. Chapter 1

You’re not quite sure what embarrasses you more: the fact that you’d been so careless with a knife in your hands, or that you bled so much that you needed help to get your hand wrapped tight enough to stop it from bleeding more. Heat burned across your cheeks regardless of what the true answer is, and moreso when there’s no words to fill the silence between you and the man attentively pressing layers of gauze over your palm.

“You should be more careful,” he says gently, though there’s a firmness to his words. “The last thing we need is you to hurt yourself so badly we can’t fix it-”

You cut him off, “-because our supplies are limited right now, I know.”

After a few moments, Bertolt sighs and carefully ties the ends of the bandage around the back of your hand. His touch lingers even after the fact, holding your hand between his so gently--as if you are made of glass.

And perhaps, to a man like him, you really are so fragile. You know the things he’s capable of. The things he and Reiner have both done, even if they constantly avoid and flit around the subject whenever you so much as get within a stone’s throw. You know the guilt they carry on their shoulders, but all you ever want to do is comfort them for it--to understand them as much as you possibly can, if only to make up for the fact that they’ve done so much to make your lives comfortable so far from Wall Rose.

Bertolt finally moves to stand, pulling you from your thoughts and leading your eyes over to where he stands at the window looking out the front of the house. It had been one of the only parts of the old farm home that hadn’t needed repairs when the three of you first found it; just covered in old cobwebs and years’ worth of dust.

You’re not quite sure what he’s watching, but you move up and over to peer past him all the same.

“Can you see Reiner?” you ask, half-hoping the third of your trio would finally be home, especially as the sun is starting to set. “He said he’d be back before it got dark.”

A warm, gentle hand presses over the top of your head before you even have a chance to let your worry bubble over. Bertolt keeps his gaze out the window, over the far-off rolling hills, trees, and the gentle horizon beyond where the light of the falling sun makes everything look aglow.

“He’ll be back soon enough. If I know him, he’s probably trying to get extra wood to repair the stable and back of the house.”

“Really?” your brows knit together. “But I already told him he doesn’t need to do that.”

Bertolt doesn’t say anything, but his silence is an answer all of its own. 

If someone were to ask you how you met Reiner and Bertolt , your answer would likely be a lie. You might try to say how the two men captivated you during cadet training, with their gentle smiles and gentler hearts. You might even go into a story about how they promised to whisk you away into a simple life in the country--away from the fighting, the politics, the stress of life within the confines of the walls.

But it isn’t true, and never was.

The two men had been fellow cadets, yes, and the three of you had graduated with some semblance of a relationship that you’d hardly call platonic. But when they’d learnt of your family’s bloodline, they had certainly whisked you away--though kidnapped is the more accurate term. Taken from your home, your noble family, hands and feet bound while Reiner held you in his arms and carried you beyond the walls—all while whispering tearful promises that it would be alright. They would keep you safe even when they took you back.

That was a year ago. Wherever it is that they had intended to take you was never revealed, even when a complicated series of events led them to forsake that secret place.

If someone were to ask you how you feel about them, you wouldn’t hesitate for a moment to say you love them with all of your heart and soul—and that is not a lie.

That was never a lie to begin with.

Maybe that’s why they gave up in their mission. Maybe still that’s why they never choose to talk about where they’re from, or where they had intended to take you—you’re only vaguely aware that there’s something special about your bloodline, something that, even in the shadow of your ignorance for the greater picture, you know is part of why everything turned out as it has.

The sun is falling below the horizon far behind the old farm house. You watch as the light begins to fade from the sky, and shadows grow longer and longer until they too begin to meld in with the darkness of night.

You let your body fall against Bertolt's side. He’s a tall man—he was tall to begin with when you met him on the first day of training—but you find a sense of comfort in it. He moves his arm until it’s held loosely around your shoulders, and you all but tucked up against him as the two of you continue to look out the window.

Your eyelids start to feel a little heavy after a few minutes, as the landscape outside continues to grow darker and darker. The day had begun from sunrise for you, so you’re not surprised to feel tired—though it would have been nice to have dinner done instead of a bloody hand and a worried partner.

“Maybe you should head upstairs and get some sleep,” Bertolt finally says, his arm tightening around you for a moment in something of an embrace. “I can finish dinner, alright?”

You’re about to concede to the man’s suggestion—sleep sounded very good right now—but it’s a dull, rhythmic shake rolling through the floor that makes your eyes snap open. Bertolt tries to hold you, but you all but wiggle out from under his arm and rocket towards the front door with all the excitement of a feverish jackrabbit.

Of course, you’re not disappointed when you race around the house and find the source of the shake in the ground.

“Reiner!”

You laugh at the sight of the titan kneeling several dozen meters behind the house, his hands full of trees that looked all but literally plucked out of the ground. He sets them down in a pile near the stablehouse, though you can’t avoid meeting the titan’s eyes when they hone suddenly on your form—joyously waving arms and all.

Some part of you knows it must look as silly as it does insane; to run up to a titan like someone greeting their long-lost lover. But you never tire of it, if only because they _are_ your lovers. Even though the world is complicated, your relationship with them moreso, you cannot deny the fact that you still feel so happy to see them; when you wake, when they come home, when you fall asleep together.

Reiner seems prepared for your awkward embrace, leaning his face down enough for you to all but run straight into it, hands outstretched to touch either side of his cheeks. He rumbles gently against your body.

“You guys are almost gonna make me jealous.”

You pull your face away just enough to look back over your shoulder. Bertolt's approaching, a quirk to his lips and amusement in his eyes. Ah, yeah, you’ve never seen his titan form personally—you’ve only heard the stories from Shiganshina.

Nevertheless, he steps up beside you and pats a hand against the side of Reiner’s face.

The titan purrs, but suddenly his gaze falls towards your injured hand—and he pulls back, head tilted. Confused and concerned.

“Oh,” you quickly pull the bandaged hand against your chest. “I-It’s nothing! Just a little cut while I was making dinner.”

Reiner’s gaze turns to Bertolt: confirming the information.

The man shrugs his shoulders. “I bandaged it up. We will need to get more medical supplies, though. Ran out of a couple things—but I’ll finish dinner.”

That seems to satisfy Reiner well enough. The titan makes a huffing noise, and then reaches a hand towards you; even as the awareness of his ability to crush you is all but deafening in your mind, you don’t flinch at all. Instead, you try not to look embarrassed as he brushes a single, massive finger against the side of your face.

_Be more careful next time._

The heat blossoms across your cheeks again, but you sputter, “N-No! I can handle dinner just fine Bert!”

You turn and run back towards the house before either of them has a chance to stop you. The two men—titan and human—simply watch you retreat back around and into the house. Bertolt sighs and crosses his arms, silent for a few moments before finally looking back at the titan behind him. There’s too many words left unsaid between them, too many lingering thoughts, too much guilt. Maybe they’ll talk about it one day; maybe they’ll even share it with you, all the layers of truth that they’ve kept hidden for so long.

“I don’t regret it, you know,” Bertolt finally says. “What we’ve made here.”

Reiner says nothing—he can’t say much of anything in his titan form—but Bertolt can feel the gentle pressure of eyes on his shoulders. Can feel the thoughts rolling in his friend and lover’s head.

The farm house was broken when they found it. Rooms caved in, wood splintered and cracked, windows all but entirely shattered—much like they felt upon finding it. Over time, the three of you had repaired the house bit by bit, leaving it more and more like the home it must have been at one time, one capable of holding a family within it’s comforting walls.

There’s still a lot of work before it’s fully repaired. Before it can hold a family proper.

Reiner and Bertolt stare at it for a while, wondering if they are anything like that house. They see a light from within and a figure all but dancing inside its embrace: you. Flitting around like a heartbeat, warming up every inch that you touch with such a life that it can bring joy into the hearts of two outcasted souls.

You are the light within their hearts.


	2. Old Enemies and New Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The past often comes back to haunt oneself, but rarely does it return with a smile and a piece of useful advice alongside it. Reiner and Bertolt learn this firsthand when they see a face they haven’t seen in almost two years--the same amount of time it’s been since they took you from inside the walls.
> 
> You don’t know who this Ymir is, but you know at least there’s something interesting behind those eyes of hers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow my writing blog on tumblr ([Attack on Titan Writings](https://attackontitanwritings.tumblr.com/)) to see all of my ramblings and ideas first-hand. There's a lot that doesn't end up getting posted to AO3, and I also livestream the Attack on Titan 2 game every Saturday (with funny highlight videos)!

You’d been busy tending to the small garden in front of the house. Too busy to notice when someone approached you—or rather, too sure in the fact that the only other people crazy enough to be this far out in the wildlands within Wall Maria could only be Reiner and Bertolt. So when you heard footsteps sinking in the dirt path leading up the hill and to the farmhouse where you knelt, your first reaction was to turn your head and welcome them with a bright, beaming smile.

“I thought you guys were out collecting more firewoo-”

The words freeze against the back of your lips when your eyes catch the sight of the person; they are neither Reiner nor Bertolt.

In fact the person before you is a woman, standing several meters away with her arms crossed over the front of her chest. Her dark hair is pulled back into a ponytail, her eyes the color of shimmering gold; hardly someone that you recognize in or out of the walls.

She’s dressed too casually to be a soldier, and too clean to be a wandering survivor if assuming there even were other living people so far out from Wall Rose. White collared shirt, Hardy work pants, leather boots--no, she is definitely not a random, hapless merchant that miraculously found themselves almost a hundred miles from Wall Maria. 

“Now you're a face I’ve never seen before,” she finally says, shifting her body until her hands perch on her hips. “But you're kinda cute. Can almost see how you tamed those two with all the shit they've pulled.”

It's only then that you notice something odd: she's not wearing any ODM gear. It would be next to impossible for anyone to be out here without it. Even with a quick glance behind her, there's no saddled horse that she would have ridden across the wide expanse of wildlands. It doesn't make any sense at all. How could someone get past so many roaming hordes of titans without either horse nor protective gear? 

But despite the confusion to who she is or how she got here, you're more worried about the familiarity she has with the others. Given the circumstances, it can hardly mean anything good.

“Why are you here?” the question finally falls from your lips as you are able to move onto your feet again, staring at the unfamiliar woman with an equal sense of confusion and apprehension. “Who are you? What do you want?”

The woman’s expression lifts with amusement. “Straight to the point I see. That’s fair.” she shrugs. “Guess Reiner and Bertolt kept you pretty secret from all their old _friends_. My feelings are almost hurt.”

You take a slow step back towards the house, and she takes a slow step forward. 

“Look: my name’s Ymir, and I’m not looking to throw your little boytoys into the slammer or anything like that.”

Your brows knit together as the sense of apprehension tightens in your stomach. The woman’s slender face and sharp eyes remind you of a fox, clever and quick to the catch. It's hard to read the intentions in her eyes, but you know the house is too far for you to make a blind sprint.And given the fact that you have absolutely no idea what resources the woman’s approached you with, the risk of trying to get to the house on your own is too great for you to swallow the fear and try.

The only comfort in the moment is that Ymir doesn't continue to approach you; she seems content to keep several paces away, though her eyes begin to shift from one thing to the next of the farm house, as if taking the sight in for the first time. Hadn't she seen it on her way up the hill?

“What do you want with Reiner and Bert?” you ask, hands clenched at your sides, but arms and elbows kept loose in the case you needed to swing them. “They… They're not here anyway.”

Ymir laughs, loud and unfiltered, so much that she has to lean forward with the force of whatever she found so amusing in your words. Annoyance begins to twist with the caution in your belly.

Ymir leans back up and gives you a look that you can’t read, one brow arched and her lips quirked in a half-grin. “Nah, they’re coming up the hill on the other side, though I thought they’d pick up the pace after hearing me approach--guess they thought I was just another pure titan.”

You blink, perfectly understanding the words coming out of her mouth, but not quite understanding the message of them all put together. How had she seen them? Why would they confuse this admittedly tall, but very human-looking woman? The questions push and prod at the back of your throat, but you don’t have a chance to open your mouth and voice them before you hear the sudden approach of heavy, rapid footsteps getting louder from around the corner of the house behind you.

“Ah, there they are,” Ymir says, almost utterly nonchalant.

You turn your head around in the same moment that both Reiner and Bertolt practically sprint around the corner of the house. For a moment you wonder why they look so _worried_ , having but only a glance at the current situation with the strange woman standing before you and your home--but then you see that both mens’ eyes are trained upon Ymir the very instant they see her, as if they genuinely _did_ have some sort of notion or warning that she was coming. 

Reiner’s arms are instantly around you, protective and tight, while Bertolt stands a pace or two ahead in between you and Ymir. The feeling of caution in the air sours, twisting into outright aggression that you’ve only felt a time or two in knowing both of them--and suddenly you’re _scared_ , completely taken back by their instantaneous response where you hadn’t known a thing about this mysterious woman named Ymir or how she knew not only who Reiner and Bertolt are, but where the three of you _lived_.

“Hey boys,” Ymir says, making a short waving gesture with one hand. “Long time no see. Heard you two were out playing house with a noble family’s heir, but I didn’t think I’d see you guys _actually_ doing some work. House looks nice. Bet it was beat up to shit when you found it.”

“What-” Bertolt growls, interrupting anything further from Ymir’s mouth. “-do you _want_?” 

“Oooh, feisty. Don’t get your hackles in a twist, I’m not here as a member of the military or anything. No military police, just an old friend coming to chat.”

The air goes still and cold. It’s so tense and tight that you’re almost unable to breathe, heart pounding and blood rushing loudly in your ears. You can start to pick up the details, bit by bit, for who this woman is and her connection to both Reiner and Bertolt, but it doesn’t sit well with you just how tight Reiner holds you against him--protecting you from something you’re not quite aware of. 

You turn your head up and try to look at Reiner as best that you’re able, whispering, “What’s going on? How does she know you both?”

He doesn’t answer you. 

“ _Reiner-!_ ” you feel the hiss at the back of your throat, but a combination of Ymir’s sudden laugh and the man’s arms squeezing around you cuts off whatever insistent question left in your lungs. Annoyance dances with confusion, though the air can stay so tense for only so long. You turn your gaze past Bertolt’s frame and watch as Ymir collects herself again, arms crossing and expression looking a bit less sharp than it did before.

“You guys once helped me protect someone I care very much about.” She tilts her head to the side and, for a moment, you can feel as much as see the focus of her eyes fall upon you. Suddenly, you feel as if in the center of the conversation despite your name not even whispered, your presence barely acknowledged beyond the fact that you are being handled like fine china above a rocky cliff. Ymir straightens her head and looks back at Bertolt. “I owe as much in return. I’m not doing anything today that’s gonna put you or your little ‘family’ in danger.”

The air is silent, but you can see the tension gathering in Bertolt’s shoulders. He’s not said anything for a while, but you already know the look in his eyes--you’ve seen it before, just a handful of rare moments when necessity pulled back the curtain of gentleness to reveal something akin to a beast backed into a corner. Fangs sharp and prepared to sink into the flesh of any that dared to get too close.

Ymir can clearly see it, but she neither cowes nor mirrors the look herself. She holds her ground and allows her words to settle in the air around the four of you, for Reiner and Bertolt to think them over--and you knowing so little in what she’s referring to. 

What history did they share together? 

Was Ymir also a shifter? Did she too come from that faraway place neither Reiner nor Bertolt will ever tell you about? She seemed to know of your bloodline, so did she know about the powers held within it? Did she _want_ them too?

The tension finally breaks when Bertolt’s body loosens. And from there, so too does Reiner’s tight grip around you, as if he’d been waiting for some sort of signal or sign for how to proceed, though he doesn’t quite let his hands fall from your shoulders. Bertolt’s shoulders fall as he sighs, and finally reaches up a hand to awkwardly rub the back of his head.

“We’re wanted criminals inside the walls, last I heard,” he says, surprisingly nonchalant about it. “So if you’re not here to arrest us, then what are you doing this far out?”

“Already told ‘ya,” Ymir purses her lips after a moment, then shrugs. “Returning a favor and letting you guys in on a little secret that might keep you under the radar for longer.”

Reiner makes a sound of confusion and takes a step forward to look at the woman, though one hand stays on your shoulder. “What do you mean?”

Ymir looks at him, then Bertolt, but her eyes pass over you in the process; you can sense something behind them, a pressure so familiar and yet so distant that it’s hard to understand for a few moments.

She _is_ a shifter.

“The scouts have… a new tool. They’re planning on retaking Wall Maria over the next several expeditions. Had a lil’ peek at some of the proposals, and it looks like this land will be retaken within the next year.”

“A year?” Reiner questions incredulously.

“Yeah,” Ymir shrugs. “That tool of theirs is apparently one helluva powerhouse. All I know is that they… _discovered_ it sometime after the Trost incident. And I know you boys remember that one. Right, Bertolt?”

Bertolt says nothing, though you can feel the reminder pressing down on his shoulders like a heavy weight.

You’re not quite sure how to feel about it, the message nor its deeper meaning. You had heard of Trost and what happened there--everyone did. Despite how much all three of you have changed since then, you can’t quite shake the fear that had struck deep within you when people started to whisper about what might happen to Wall Rose at the time, should it fall.

But retaking Wall Maria?

On one hand you’re absolutely elated, if only because reclaiming the land beyond Wall Rose would improve the lives of countless people--but it also means that your life, the life you’d carefully mended and built upon with both Reiner and Bertolt, is now being threatened.

It’s... a bittersweet feeling.

But Bertolt remains unconvinced, shifting his weight and crossing his arms firmly over his chest in a gesture of annoyance you’ve grown stupidly familiar with. He doesn’t even acknowledge the mention of Trost--and you can hardly blame him.

“Even if you are a member of the military police, there’s no way you’d know all this information. How can we know you’re telling the truth?”

Ymir’s lips twist in a half-grin.

“There’s no real way to convince you I suppose. You guys are far enough out of the way that the expeditions themselves won’t find you, but if they _do_ manage to make a miracle happen, then it’s only a matter of time before you’re discovered.”

She lets the words sink in for a few moments before continuing, “Not gonna try to toss out a list of crimes for you both since I’m shit with that and all, but you might wanna consider how that will affect that little cutie you got there and all. I bet you love ‘em enough that you wouldn’t even risk it.”

Your heart twists with the blunt depth of the woman's words. Despite a sudden warmth blooming in your cheeks, you look towards both Reiner and Bertolt to see how they’re reacting--it’s so strange to hear someone describe your feelings for one another, and so oddly comforting in the fact that they don’t try to deny it at all. That they care so much that, even if they didn’t trust this woman for a moment, the mere possibility of you being put in the crossfire is enough to leave them doubtful in their decision.

“I’m not telling you to relocate or anything,” Ymir finally says, deciding that she would get no further quip or argument. “Just be aware of what’s going on. What’s gonna happen in the near future. So you can protect the one you care about, like I do.”

She looks at the three of you for a moment, something strange and warm in her fox-like focus. You’re not quite sure what it is or what it means, but you’re snapped out of the stream of thoughts when the woman suddenly turns on her heel and faces away from the house.

“Just to let you guys in on some news happening in the walls,” she says, almost offhandedly. “Long story short: Christa’s real name is Historia, and she’s actually the queen now. Doing a real good job with it too, and gets to be privy on all sorts of information not even the military police get t’hear about.”

She lets the words sit for a breath before walking away along the dirt path rolling down the hill, until she’s drifted out of sight as quickly as she’d drifted in. You’re not quite sure what to think, especially since the name she mentioned didn’t ring a bell for you--but the news of a new queen is certainly something confusing.

“I… thought the king didn’t have any daughters,” you murmur, brows knitting as you look towards Reiner, then Bertolt (who has turned around to face you by now), as if they might have a proper explanation. What you find instead is their expressions tense with something of concentration. They look distant almost, farther away than you can reach in a string of thoughts that you can but scarcely begin to understand. Bits and pieces of background information can only pull you so far along.

And then, suddenly, you feel angry. You feel genuinely, honestly _angry._

“Will one of you explain what’s going on?”

Reiner’s eyes shoot in your direction as you pull away from him, dislodging his hand on your shoulder. Neither he nor Bertolt try to reach out for you again. You meet their gazes (Reiner’s, then Bertolt’s) and feel a growing sense of unease with the looks in their eyes.

Worried. Concerned. Unsure.

You’ve seen this look before in both of them. The recognition is in part a comfort, if only because you have _something_ to go off of rather than nothing at all. For all that the boys try to do to protect you, this is the one aspect that you loathe most.

“You guys are terrible at communicating,” you murmur, sighing and taking a step forward to reach an arm out both for Reiner and Bertolt’s faces. You pull them close enough to hug, one arm wrapped around their necks as best as you can manage and, after a few moments, feeling each of them nuzzle into the side of your neck.

You can feel their breathing, hot against your throats--and perhaps it is your connection to them as titans, but you know the slowing rhythm bumping in the back of your thoughts is their heartbeats. Slowing. Calming down. Wherever it is that worked them up so much, the things they weren’t explaining to you on purpose or accident, is finally smoothing over them.

Bertolt sighs against you, letting his body lean just enough that, in the moment, you feel how tired he is. The rush of the moment made you forget that the two of them had been out chopping wood for the last couple hours and are probably exhausted.

A gentle smile pulls at your lips.

“How about we go inside the house-” you tug yourself back enough to look into both men’s eyes. “-and we can sit down and eat something. And _then_ one of you can tell me who that was and why it matters so much.”

The look on your face leaves little to no room for either of them to argue; the way their expressions soften are evidence enough to the fact that keeping details from you is no longer doing anything to help. Sure, you’re a smart person one way or another, but there’s plenty of questions you have that need to be answered--not from distrust, but simply because you don’t want them to bear whatever burden weighing on their shoulders. The burden you see so often in their eyes when they think you’re not looking.

“... I think that’s pretty fair,” Reiner finally says, voice soft. “We owe you that much.”

“You don’t _owe_ me anything,” you say, arm unwrapping from Reiner’s shoulders so you can caress the back of your fingers over the side of his face. “I just want to know what I can do to help you guys too. What, do you think I’m going to run away or something?”

Reiner’s eyes shift to Bertolt, who merely looks at him in kind, their faces red.

The moment feels almost comical, and you can’t contain the laugh that pushes too hard against the back of your lips. It almost makes you lose your footing as you step back, hands up to your mouth in a useless attempt to hide the honest emotion spilling out.

Bertolt and Reiner’s faces only grow redder and that, in turn, makes you laugh even harder. 

“You guys-” the words gently cut in between your laughs. “-are stuck with me regardless. I’ve already made that decision, and no dark secret is going to change that.”

A moment passes. 

“Is that a promise?” Bertolt finally whispers, meeting your eyes with such a depth of devotion that it almost takes away the breath right from your lungs. 

You feel a hot pressure in your chest as you nod.

“Of course it is,” you meet his gaze and then look towards Reiner, who wears his loving, bleeding heart on his sleeve. “I promise I’ll always be with you guys, even if you are complete idiots sometimes.”


	3. Creative Solutions [NSFW]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Desperate times call for desperate (and creative) measures, especially when your lovers are both six feet tall, very _proportional_ , and don’t want to accidentally injure you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing about Bert and Reiner in this AU has to be one of my biggest guilty pleasures bc I like to think the reader is out here living the dream: two loving boyfriends, both of them totally happy to give them many orgasms, building up a little house for themselves and not having to pay taxes OR deal with neighbors (or anyone else).
> 
> Yes now that is the soft cottagecore life I crave

You love Bertolt and Reiner. There are no conditions, no strings, and certainly no ‘but’s in that love save for one tiny, little, barely-significant detail that has come to drive you up a wall several times over:

They won’t have sex with you - at least, not the penetrative sort - and it drives you utterly, completely mad.

They’ll often be so willing to put their hands and heads between your thighs to leave you a quaking mess, but not once have they allowed their hips to take the same spot. Try as you might time and time again to beg and plead in varying levels of desperation, their answers came all the same.

“Darling,” Reiner might whisper, voice taut and lost amidst his own feverish lust but his restraint holding stubborn all the same. “We can’t do that - we’ll... w-we’ll hurt you.”

Bertolt would never be much help either, often being the one with his lips between your legs or the one keeping them open for Reiner’s deft fingers in blissful betrayal. If you were to ever get a word from him it’s most often in pieces, syllables shattered as he ruts needing against your ass or into the bed, but never where you want him the most.

“Too big,” he’d remind you, as if you weren’t avidly aware that both your lovers were well _equipped_ in matters of pleasure. “Can’t take a chance.”

The two of them were always something inseparable even if they didn’t always agree with one another; protecting you, even in something so silly as having sex without protection or lubricant, seemed to be about the only thing they agreed on without argument. The only thing they wouldn’t sway on, regardless of how utterly desperate they got when tensions were hot and your bodies felt hotter still.

But eventually there is a compromise. Not an ideal one, but you’ve accepted that oil is but one luxury too difficult to procure and that your lovers are - for lack of a better description - very well endowed. The thought of them sliding inside you even with ample lubricant is already intimidating enough. Without it? Not impossible, but a problem requiring a solution that is both creative and patient.

Very patient.

And it drives you utterly mad.

* * *

You’ve lost count as to how many times they’ve brought you to the edge. Three times at minimum; Reiner toyed with your restraint first with his fingers, then mouth, and finally yielded for Bertolt to take a turn in front of you.

And for as shy as the man often seemed, there is no denying that Bertolt is quite adept to detail. Watching your every expression and listening to even the smallest gasp, he seems to hone in on rubbing the pads of his long fingers directly against the spot that makes you want to writhe and sob. 

You moreover crave for nothing more than the shape of his cock sitting snug within your body, but Reiner doesn’t allow you to even entertain the thought just yet. He holds you gentle and firm with his strong arms around your torso, preventing any movement save for the desperate motions of your hips.

“I-is this not enough?” You whimper, back arching when Bertolt’s index and ring finger curl inside you. “I’m gonna c-cuh-m...”

“You’re not,” Bertolt whispers. “You’re going to get close though. As many times as we need before you can take us.”

He sounds so confident in the fact, so utterly sure of his control over both the moment and your body that the notion itself feels like a blaze of heat in your belly. The lust of the moment is certainly not lost on either of them too; while you can see the aching stiffness of Bert’s cock between his legs as he all but sits between yours, Reiner’s hardon ruts against the curve of your ass rather shamelessly. Shorter than Bertolt, but with a girth that makes your mouth almost water and your stomach do flips.

“You promised us you’d behave,” Reiner whispers into your ear lowly, edging on something of a growl. He too is on the edge and rendered into a near-desperate beast of lust. “Remember - break the rules and you just get to watch us jerk off instead.”

“Noooo,” the word falls from your lips in a long, drawn-out sob. “You guys are s-so mean!”

You can hear Bertolt chuckle as he leans forward, pressing a kiss to your cheek and then a peck over Reiner’s lips. “Maybe we are just a little mean,” he murmurs, fingers yet keeping such a perfect pace that it’s hard for you to think. “But I think we want to be inside you just as much as you do. We just need to be careful.”

Despite understanding the words and the intention, all you can offer in reply is with a low whine pushed against the back of your teeth.

You are going to go insane by the time they’re done, but at least it will be a blissful insanity.

**Author's Note:**

> If you want to read more of my stuff, check out my Attack on Titan writing blog on Tumblr @ [attackontitanwritings](https://attackontitanwritings.tumblr.com/).


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